The best (and worst) names for climbing routes we've ever seen

Route setters are arguably some of the most creative people in rock climbing. They envision the moves, prepare the climb, and crown their work of art by giving it a name. 

Some are funny, others are ironic, and more than a fair share are straight up cringy.

We recently asked our Dynamite Starfish community to share the best (and worst) names for climbing routes they've ever seen...and boy did we get some good ones.

You'll want to scroll on to read these! 

Twist and Shout and Ankles Away

"These two routes were supposedly named because a guy broke both his ankles on the trad line right next to them.🫢😅😂" @straysafe

Grade: 5.9+ 

Height: 70 ft

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐

Located: Foster Falls, Tennessee

Photo: Mel & Luke B.

Coyotes in the Henhouse

FUN FACT: Lock up your chicken coop folks. Coyotes are extremely athletic and can clear fences up to 8 feet tall!

This sport climbing route stands tall and proud overlooking the forest below. You'll need to be an extremely persistent predator...aka climber...to clip the chains on this California classic recommended by @carolenabird

Grade: 5.10d

Height: 70 ft

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐

Located: Holcomb Valley, California

Photo: @rockraft

Fine Nine is a 5.9

"It's a 5.9 at Jackson Falls, a great introduction to the friction slab that is prevalent in the area. To most, calling it a 5.9 is quite a sandbag, or at least an eye-opener 😄" @crimsonxholic

Grade: 5.9 

Height: 55 ft

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐

Located: Jackson Falls, Illinois

Photo: Chris Tregge

Next time for sure

"I did not get it the next time either…" @saric7

We may try our best to have a Try, Try, Try...and Send attitude, but sometimes route setters have other plans that leave us climbers saying... 

Taco Flavored Kisses

Hersey's Chocolate Kisses that taste like tacos or taco breath kisses from your climber crush?? Not sure what the route setters were daydreaming of here, but any crag snacks that have to do with Mexican food are our best friend!

Grade: 5.10+ Trad

Height: 130 ft

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐

Located: Indian Creek, Utah

Photo: @jessylhewitt on another stunning crack line

Lies and Propaganda

"I had a terrible time on it as a newer climber my first time there. Was assured it was fun and I would like it. Lies. Lies and propaganda. I have since been back on it and don’t hate it so much 😆. But it’s sort of just a phrase that sticks out to me every time I’m on a route I don’t like. They’re all lies and propaganda." @erendeavor

 

Grade: 5.9 

Height: 55 ft

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐

Located: Rumney, NH

Photo: Raja Hamid

Lessa the Puramatic 6000 Kitty

Oh hey, where are all our adventure cat lovers at?!

"Like many people in the Austin area this was my first outdoor sport climb. It's a 5.5 😂" @sleepeatclimbrepeat

Grade: 5.5 

Height: 30 ft

Rating: ⭐⭐

Located: Reimers Ranch, Texas

Photo: Randy Von Zee

Prime Directive

"There’s an area with both trad & sport routes. Prime Directive is a sports route when it should 💯 be a trad name based on what it means in Star Trek. Would be sooooo good as a trad name.

Basically you don’t interfere with civilizations that haven’t started to reach a certain degree of space travel. Even if their laws & practices are problematic you let them reach the future naturally without interfering.

I’m sure trekies could give a more in depth explanation but it’s basically leaving a civilization as you found it!" @veela_valoom

Grade: 5.11b

Height: 100 ft

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐

Located: Red River Gorge, Kentucky

Photo: @veela_valoom hanging out in her happy place...RRG

If Dreams Were Thunder

"A stunning and inspiring route Ten Sleep, Wyoming and a classic song to boot!" @carolenabird

Grade: 5.12b 

Height: 80 ft

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐

Located: Ten Sleep Canyon, Wyoming

Photo: Josh Knox

And a few more (cringy) honorable mentions...

"I saw 3 routes next to each other called No Diggity (they labeled as beginner), A Fair Amount of Diggity (5.10), and An Overwhelming Surplus of Diggity (5.12-)" @cbjgirl23

"Deez Nuts (5.8 Red River Gorge)...ironically, it's a sport route" @erikalleycat

"Shoe Fart (Kraft Boulders)" @jasongoesup

"Booger Boy (5.10b Reimers Ranch)" @emilyclimbsrocks

"Butterfingers make me h*rny (5.8 Joshua Tree)" @_adventureminds

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How about you? What's the most memorable name for a climbing route or boulder you've ever seen?

Share your thoughts in the comments below. We'd love to hear from you!

Psst…Our tees are a great conversation starter!

With so many styles, we know you’ll be the climber having the most fun at the crag. 

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